Posted by
Ralphie Parker on Tuesday, August 29, 2006 5:27:48 PM
Two days since my great Minnesota getaway from the evil clutches of Chad the Elder, the ringleader of the
Fraters Libertas. Chad still has no clue about my flight to freedom, because he's been too busy trying to 'milk' up his Saturday fair episode of making Generalissimo Duane, the very patient and tolerant producer of the Hugh Hewitt Show, milk a cow. Poor Duane knew he was being set up, and yet he was still brave enough to face up to the challenge, and keep his dignity.
Chad, being the cruel human being he is, couldn't let the Honey (the name of the cow) Affair go. He didn't take the high road. He made sure he published pictures, complete with all sorts of blue humor references and innuendos that should be beneath most conservatives. But not Chad. I used to be owned by him. I know how he works. That's why I left him. And the funny thing is, I've had a two day head start, and Chad doesn't have a clue. He'll never find me.
Especially after reading the caliber of reporting about Duane today on the Fraters site that would compare to Los Angeles Times standards, I have decided to make it my mission to travel the country far and wide, and educate as many people as I can about the real Chad the Elder.
For instance, people don't know that Chad the Elder meets every Thursday for lunch with lefty Strib columnist, Nick Coleman. Although that might seem a bit unusual, I know the truth. Chad is secretly a lefty posing as a conservative. It's all very Machiavellian in nature. Chad actually is all for light rail, is all for a bump in taxes to help pay for the new stadium, all the usual lefty tactics. He can be seen at DFL events, but usually in the back and wearing sunglasses to try to hide his identity. He and Coleman get together every week to plot out how Chad can write a little here and there to sound conservative, and then do something like the fair post on poor Duane and the cow, thereby harming the credibility of the whole Northern Alliance. It's really pretty clever, if it weren't so devious in nature, and damaging innocent bystanders like Hugh and Duane.
So the next time you read anything on the Fraters Libertas site, keep in mind one thing. Whenever you read the by-line at the bottom and it says Chad the Elder, you're really reading what Nick Coleman thinks conservatives want to hear.
Don't worry about Chad finding me. I hear the East Coast is nice this time of year. I'll post pictures when I can.